Marriage in America


Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh (Genesis 2:24).

Some incidents happened recently that got me to thinking about couples and marriage. Marriages in our society seem to be becoming more and more rocky and troubled, with many dissolving altogether.

... a prudent wife is from the Lord (Proverbs 19:14b).

A few years ago, an older couple in the church Jim and I attended were hosting a guest speaker in their home. The speaker made the comment that no matter what the husband said, his wife found a way to disagree and argue with him. This isn't the way married couples should live.

And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, for this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder (Matthew 19:4-6).

In a recent situation, I was visiting with a couple, who were apparently having problems. Although they tried to hide it from me and act as if nothing was wrong, the tension was too thick to even cut with a knife. Instead of working together and being on the same team, they were opposing each other. Proving they were right and getting their way had taken priority, and all phases of their marriage were suffering

And from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; and they twain shall be one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder (Mark 10:6-9).

At another time, I was going to be traveling to promote my book for two weeks, because I had two back-to-back events. Of course, as a pastor, Jim rarely gets to travel with me, but we decided that he'd come up after Sunday services and leave Wednesday morning in time to get back for the evening Bible study. A very strong Christian man seemed so surprised that we did this. He finally shrugged and said that it was good we still liked to be together. I was shocked, because he's been married for a number of years. Did he mean he and his wife didn't like to be together? How sad!


Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breast satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love (Proverbs 5:18-19).

The above examples is not how God wants married couples to behave. When it happens, one or both are usually wrapped up in their own selfish expectations. As Warren Wiersbe states in Be Mature, "God's wisdom makes the believer agreeable and easy to live with and

work with" (kindle loc. 1354). The best way to have a strong marriage is to put Christ at the center of it. The more I love Christ and submit to His will, the more I love those around me, including my husband. And, God's love flowing through me is unconditional. Who is at the center of your world? Be honest. Is is Christ or is it you?

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angles, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not love, I am nothing, And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profiteth me nothing.
Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly. seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; rejoiceth not in inquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endueth all things. Love never faitleth.... (1 Corinthians 1: 1-8a, KJV with "charity" translated as "love").

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